Gun Safety

Overheard during Bath Time..

Lily: Hurry mouse, get on the boat!

A toy paintbrush serves as the boat for a very pink plastic mouse, which proceeds to drive a few inches away from my nose.

Lily: Good thing this boat is here. You might sink. Mouses don't like to swim.

The paintbrush is given a wild flourish, poking me in the eye a few times for good measure.

Me: Shouldn't you try driving the boat over at THAT end of the tub? You'll have more room to sail.

Lily: Nope. I like it this way.

Paintbrush is flailed around a few more times with loud zooms, and she manages to poke herself in the eye during this.

Lily: ARGH! I don't want to do this anymore. I know what I should do.

The paintbrush is suddenly pointed at me, and loud gunshots are fired from one end.

Me: What was that? Did it break?

Lily: No. It shooted you. It's a G-word. You know.

Me: No, what?

Lily: A G-U-N. It shooted you because it was mad.

Me: Do you know what one of those really is? Guns aren't nice toys for kids. Or for anybody, really. They can hurt people.

Lily: I know. Only boys play with them. Except for Katie. Katie LOVES guns and shoots everyone at school.

Me: Well...I don't think we should play pretend about things that hurt people. It's not nice.

Lily: Katie does it. I'm going to love whatever she loves.

Me: Let's just try something else for right now. We're not going to pretend about mean toys here.

Several moments are spent where her brow is furrowed deeply in thought.

Lily: All right. I'm pretending it's a sword now. I can stab with it.

Me: I don't think so. That's still not very nice. Try something else.

Lily: Fine. Now it's a kitty-scratcher, so I can claw the eyes out of stuff.

Me: Try again. I don't think we should play any of those things. Do you know what can happen when people use things like guns and swords to hurt people?

Lily: Yup. They die. It's like getting knocked out for a very very very long time. And then we bury them.

Me: Well, yes, that CAN happen. That's why it's not safe or nice to pretend to hurt people -

Lily: And they're buried in the GROUND, and then WORMS eat them, and, and -

Me: Wait! Hey. Where did you hear all of that?

Lily: Well, I picked up a worm by the garbage can at school. They live underground. It was all sandy and grody.

Me: Oh. They do live underground, you're right. But what made you think -

Lily: Then I buried it again. I put a bunch of sand on top of it before all the boys could jump on it. It was sort of alive still. Worms are gross. I didn't want to eat it. Now I have to go to the bathroom.

She jumps out of the tub, leaving me to collect my thoughts.

Let's Make a Blog!

Okay, so this wasn't initially Lily's idea. But she fully approved when I told her that she got to decide what goes on here. Mostly. So without further ado -

"Brown."

An Original Bathtime Composition by Lily.

B-r-o-w-n, b-r-o-w-n
Lily's hair is always brown
Lily's eyes are always brown
Cupboards are always brown, walls are always brown
P-o-o-p, brown poop is always brown.
B-r-o-w-n!

This began with very lofty, intellectual aims (as much as a song can be, when sung fully in a Pee-Wee Herman falsetto).... but then, kind of went down the toilet. Ba dum PSH!